Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Day 1

I have decided to start blogging daily like Sean . What about? I'm not sure yet. I just feel like there is so much inside of me right now that if I don't get it out I am going to drown in my own thoughts.
I figure this will be about weight loss, marathon training, being a mom, being a woman and just plan being. It may be boring and sometimes depressing or funny, but since I only have one follower at this time (thanks honey) I shouldn't bore to many people.

First off, yes I am still struggling with weight loss. I wrote my last blog with only 10 more pounds to go and now on this date we might make it close to 15 pounds. What is going on? I am so depressed over our financial situation that I am once again turning to food for my comfort. Oh, we have no money to go to the store, but I will swing by and grab a giant helping of burger and fries please with a diet coke. ha I am now one of those people. "Yes, I need a number 5 combo with a diet coke. "
So, help me God. I refuse to be held down any longer by this weight...so more to come on this subject I'm sure. As for today, I made a poor lunch choice at Panda Express after not eating enough for breakfast this morning and a starving stomach and screaming children lead my car in their direction. Squeaky brakes and all. (my brakes started squeaky last week and 'I don't do cars' so they will just keep squeaking until Joe takes them in to have them fixed or my Mom catches wind of them and offers to fix them since she is a mechanic at heart) For now, I just try and swing in the parking spaces with as little braking as possible. Good thing the kids are buckled in!

Marathon~ Yep, I wrote it out and now it will be forever haunting me to bring this goal around to being true. Joe has been talking Tri's for sometime and I never had the urge to do that with him, but I received an email from the Kansas City Marathon in October (why, I don't know) but as I am looking all around the site I just kept getting more excited and more excited. So, I'm gonna do it. Not this years, I'm not that dislusional, but 2010. So that gives me a year to train for it (hence why this is called day 1). I know nothing about running distance even back in school when we had to do distance I hated it with a capital H, but Joe and I have been running the last couple of months close to 2 miles a night and minus the giant hill, I do pretty well and just stop because we are back at home and our route is completed.
I have a new running buddy, Meika, the Boxador(no longer) homeless dog with boundless energy, so I am going to take advantage of her and use her to train with.
Sometime next spring I will try for a half-marathon and see where I am at physically and will try and sign up for every 5k, benefit race KC offers to keep me going and steady.
Enough about that for now.

As for being a Mom and a woman. Super depressed. Not sure really what is going on. I feel exhausted, cranky and just down in the dumps. Messed my neck up carrying Bella a few weekends ago and even after visiting the chiropractor (which could not get me in without consequent visits) is still killing me and causing these giant headaches everyday.
We have no extra money to go to a different chiropractor that was recommended to me by a friend and he of course is not in our network for insurance so he would be extra. So that is frustrating that he seems just beyond my reach and yet I need him so much.

I finally had a hair cut a few weekends back (same day as the bad back deal). I went to a new place, which was no where near as nice as I'm used to (huge salon snob with no money for huge salon prices) but after only paying $40 instead of $80 I was feeling pretty good about it. She didn't do "messed up, piecey cropped bob" that I asked for, but at least I didn't have mis-matched sides. Been there done that. I didn't allow her to color my hair, even though my sparkles(grays) were showing something terrible, thinking I could save even more money if I just used the at home dye that was sitting under my sink.
Yep, I read the date and everything on the box before I began and hadn't realized how old it was, but what could it hurt?
Well, now that I have different degrees of black to my hair and it looks like I'm trying to impression a vampire, I now realize how important that expiration date might have been.
It will fade...eventually.

So with my attitude, dark drabby hair, and scarce funds, the whole woman, mommy thing is taking a pretty hard hit. Not to mention the few extra pounds I have allowed to slip back on.

Day 1 to begin a new chapter.

5 comments:

  1. Things will get better. I know you have been down, but you are a very strong, smart, intelligent young woman who is amazing and extraordinary. You do a wonderful job with our family and without you I wouldn't be where I am today. I can't wait to cheer you on during your first marathon. You will do great. I love you!
    Joe

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  2. awww, shucks honey. Thanks and sorry I have been such a B to live with lately. I am trusting you when you say things will get better.

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  3. You have come a long way yourself and it can be done!! :ook foward to seeing you at the finish line!!
    Love,
    irene

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  4. Thanks Irene! And thanks for being my second follower.

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  5. Hi
    I have a FANTASTIC program that I would like you to try out!
    I'll even give it to you for free,If you are interested please
    get in touch with me at Info@healthlady.com

    Thanks Nancy

    ReplyDelete